This is a diary entry from the 7th of November 2014, I’ve loved re reading this one!
It’s been 74 days since I last had a drink! I feel bloody amazing. I’m so happy I could hug everyone I meet.
If you are trying to talk yourself in or out of doing this, please just give it a go.
You have nothing to lose but the hangovers, feelings of self hatred, anxiety, bloated face, irritation, self loathing, guilt, shame, liver damage, weight gain, insecurities, depression the list could go on. I had every single one of these plus another ten or more. Why? Why? Why?
I have let go of so much over the last 74 day, perfectionism, workaholism, being a martyr, people pleasing and more.
What seemed like insurmountable problems in my life are merely the day to day ups and downs of life. Instead of having huge highs and many despairing lows, I now feel on an even keel…but with a buzz in my head that tells me I can do anything!
My marriage has improved, my relationship with my children is wonderful, I’m so much more productive in my business and we have already seen sales grow! I have even started making jewellery, something I have wanted to do for years and have already sold some pieces!!
I still have another addiction to beat, but I know I can do it! I’m full of hope and excitement for the future.
If you are thinking to yourself that I’m making it sound too easy…well, I do think it can be if you can get in the right frame of mind. I have been drinking in a damaging way since I was 13, I will be 40 next year. There came a point where the excuses were just getting silly. I knew what I had to do…I had to not pick up that drink, do what you need to do… talk, run, bake, shower, bath, walk the dog, dance, read, eat, clean, do a class…anything!!! It does get easier I promise and life is so much easier without the alcohol.
This is a quote I read that I love…
‘To sober up seems to many like making life “so serious,” as if seriousness precluded joy, warmth, spontaneity and fun. But there can be a delusional, blind quality to non-sober festivities. To have our eyes open soberly with all our senses and memory intact allows some of the most rewarding, soul-nourishing, and long-lasting pleasures possible.’