Thank you to this swan for her update:
After a wobbly start to the day – I woke up worrying about something from work yesterday which turned out ok in the end – but anyway, as I was driving to work I saw this young(ish) guy walking his daughter to school, well not walking really as they were skipping along together and having such a giggle it was so lovely and heartwarming to see. It made me slightly saddened as my daughter will neve experience that kind of joy with her dad because of his alcoholism and total denial of the problem.
Once in work I realised the muck up from yesterday had actually worked out ok, for all the wrong reasons, but I had ultimately it turned out done the right thing (phew) but then we had a guy come to give us a talk about the work his charitable group does, it was listening to him which made me realise just how far I’ve come in the last 4yrs as they as a group helped me out in a crisis moment when my hubby left me as good as bankrupt, not caring that we (me and our daughter) could be almost as good as homeless for all he cared. This group helped me get together the deposit for a rental along with financial help for a tank of fuel oil to heat the new home. My god I will never be able to repay this kindness as that kind of help and support is priceless.
Becoming alcohol free for me is one of the next steps I have taken to taking back the reins of my life, just like I didn’t want my daughter being ashamed that her dad was of one of the local alcoholics in our old community, I knew I needed to sort myself out to as it would be so easy to head that way myself with the way I was heading with my own drinking – it’s ironic really that it was only after he left that my own drinking started to worsen. Allen Carr’s book likens alcohol and that slippery slope so well by comparing it to the venus fly trap, I’m so grateful to have escaped the trap and hope never to start slipping down again.